I’m no longer celibate. I had sex with an old flame: Sapphire.
It happened Saturday night. We were supposed to go see the movie Black Panther. When we showed up at the theater the line was so long that we just turned around and drove back to Sapphire’s loft. We decided to make it a Netflix & Chill night.
I got comfortable on her couch and she got comfortable on me. Casual flirting quickly turned into straight up sex.
It’s the first time I’ve had sex in a long time….and it felt good!
Do I regret it? No.
However, I do hope that Sapphire will take it as more or less a one night stand (if there is such a thing with an ex-girlfriend). I doubt this will happen. Sapphire still loves me. That much is clear.
The morning after she slapped me on the ass and said, “I forgot how good you are in bed.” My ego was stroked, but I immediately worried about the consequences of fucking an ex-girlfriend.
I guess we will see what the future holds.
On another note, today I came out to my dad’s side of the family. Some of them know I’m gay. Some of them found out today via text message.
I told my dad’s two oldest sisters I’m gay. They weren’t surprised. They both said they’d heard rumors. I informed them the only reason I didn’t tell them years ago is because dad didn’t want them to know.
Why? Because he was ashamed. He was more concerned about what people thought than my personal happiness.
I’ve reached a point in my life where I simply don’t give a fuck. I know who I am. I know what I want. I want to be happy. I want to live openly. I want to be at peace. I want a woman who will love me unconditionally. I want to be comfortable around my extended family with my woman.
As for my dad…he will just have to cope. I’m done trying to make him comfortable with me and who I am. At this point he can either accept it or get the hell out of my life. I’m not tip-toeing around his feelings anymore.
Side note: if you’re interested in reading the text messages between me and my aunts I posted them in my group chat. Join it if you want to read them.