I have a gay black male coworker who recently had a child with a black lesbian couple. Their situation is interesting for a number of reasons…
This particular coworker is effeminate as hell. The dude is good-looking but he likes to wear some dick hugging ass cutting pants that make me itch just looking at them. He also walks and carries himself like…well….a sissy. Think this…
The lesbian couple in question consist of a nice looking fem and an obese mannie fresh looking stud (the common black lesbian coupling in Atlanta…SMH). The couple got married two years ago and the nice looking fem came to the table with THREE kids she had in previous situationships with MEN (plural).
Can you guess which of these two carried the child?
You guessed it…the fem who already had three kids.
So the gay effeminate nigga and the fem fucked to create a child. That child is now being raised in the same sex lesbian couple’s household with the fem’s other three children. The have a blended co-parent situation.
I’m happy for them…but I couldn’t do it.
I don’t think I could ever co-parent with a gay man or a gay couple. Why?
Well, let’s say I’m married and my wife carries the child with one of the gay men’s sperm. We all agree to a co-parent situation. That works fine for a few years, but then she and I divorce or something happens with the child. Which set of parents in this situation has primary custodial rights to the child? Would the sperm donor’s parental rights supersede my rights?
These aren’t questions I want to ever ask myself.
I would prefer a situation where I know the sperm donor and HE (not a couple) takes a passive role. What this means is me and my wife will raise the children but he can and should come around for birthdays, graduations, etc. He doesn’t have to contribute financially. His role (which I’ve determined he should have because part of me believes every children should have a father) in the family basically exist so the children can know HIM and where they come from, but that’s about it.
With that said, there are certain characteristics I expect in a man. I expect a man to carry himself like a man. What that means is I would never ever combine my DNA with a man who is effeminate. I don’t care if this offends anyone. There is something off-putting about it. I expect him to be a productive member of society. I expect him to be kind, honest, respectful, and generous. I expect him to be a role model to my children.
I already know who my sperm donor will be. So, it’s not a matter of WHO anymore. Now it comes down to WHEN. And because I haven’t met her (my wife) there is a possibility that it might not happen as I have no intentions of being a single mother.
Even still, I do wonder if these same sex blended families actually work?